


Five Year Reunion

by puff_the_magic_dragon



Category: High School Musical (Movies), Ummm The Knicks a bit? What??
Genre: Attempted Angst, Heart-to-Heart, Love Confessions, M/M, Mature Sharpay, Nice Sharpay, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Reunions, Ryan wears a floral sport coat, but the author is not great with that, is a bitch, that one annoying cheerleader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:48:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23832658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/puff_the_magic_dragon/pseuds/puff_the_magic_dragon
Summary: When Ryan left Albuquerque he left everything he knew with it. He rebuilt himself as the person he always wanted to be. But when he returns five years later for his high school reunion, he realized there was one thing that had stuck with him all this time: his love for Chad Danforth. Not that that was much of a surprise to anyone, really.Chad never understood his attachment to Ryan Evans during his high school years, in fact, it took a breakup with his long term girlfriend, Taylor, to fully grasp just how much Ryan meant to him. He planned to say something at the two-year reunion, but Ryan hadn't shown. Now he was graduated from college and signed to the Knicks, living in the same city as Ryan, but he still has to go home to finally get to see the man he loves again.
Relationships: Chad Danforth/Ryan Evans, Kelsi Nielsen/Original Female Character(s), Troy Bolton/Gabriella Montez, Zeke Baylor/Sharpay Evans, a very brief Ryan/Male OG
Comments: 38
Kudos: 319





	1. The Reunion - Ryan

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, Hello everyone who is still in the High School Musical fandom. What am I doing writing this fic, you may ask? That is a very good question that I do not have the answer to. I rewatched the movies recently and finally realized just h o w fucking gay it is so I figured why not,,, and then I had this sitting in my docs for like five months. But I've decided to finish it so here you go! Part one!  
> I already have quite a bit more so if anyone is interested in reading it, drop a like and a comment and I'll make sure to post it soon :)  
> Warnings for this chapter:  
> Use of the f- and d-slurs, mild, undetailed panic attack, and homophobia (if that wasn't obvious from the first warning)  
> Anyway! Enjoy and let me know what you think!  
> -Cody Helene

“It’ll be fun, she said. They all asked about you at the two year, she said. Don’t worry about it, they’ll love you all the same, she said.” Ryan muttered as he stalked around his old bedroom. He hadn’t been home in five years, but the room was largely unchanged. He had successfully skipped Christmases and summers, always claiming he was too busy at Julliard. His parents weren’t happy about it, but they understood, instead they visited him, something that only proved that they knew he was lying as well. 

He didn’t stay away because he was busy, he stayed away because he didn’t want to face them all again, not after spending eighteen years of his life in that town pretending he was straight. After graduation, he left and didn’t look back. He blocked all his past classmates on his socials, besides Sharpay and Kelsi, of course, and then he finally let himself come out. 

All in all, it went over quite well, his sister had known since they were twelve and he was telling her about the cute boy from baseball camp, his parents always loved him no matter what. Surprisingly, the hardest person to tell had been Kelsi—or unsurprisingly, considering he had led her on for two years before he told her—but she had taken it in her stride with a soft smile and a kiss on his cheek. She had a girlfriend of her own now, even brought her home for the reunion that Ryan was in the process of convincing himself not to go to. 

It’s not like he thought his old classmates wouldn’t accept him, after all, they had all bonded over being different. And he had no doubt in his mind that, even if some chose to dislike him for his gayness, Gabby would make sure they stayed silent. It was more the fact that he had cut ties with all of them, cut them out of his life completely, didn’t even spare them a thought, other than the odd dream of warm, wide smiles and bouncy hair… 

_That_ was what he was dreading. Seeing him again. The boy from baseball camp. 

“He’s asked about you, you know,” Ryan’s steps faltered when he heard his sister’s voice from the doorway. He turned to look at her. 

Surprisingly, Sharpay didn’t wear much pink anymore. Instead, she stood there wearing a dark blue button-up and skinny jeans, one of Ryan’s beautiful baby nephews on her hip, chewing on a bit of her hair. She was a teacher now, Ms. D had taken her on as a protege before retiring completely. Her husband, Zeke, had taken up Coach Bolton’s old job. She had grown so much, and Ryan could not be more proud. 

“He was probably trying to find something to talk about besides basketball,” Ryan replied, not bothering to pretend like he didn’t know who she was talking about. He heard his sister snort as he turned towards his closet. “Should I go flamboyant?” He asked as Sharpay’s bare footsteps sounded across his wooden floor. 

“You should go with whatever you feel comfortable in.” Came her very New Sharpay reply. Ryan rolled his eyes but smiled. 

“Flamboyant it is.” He said, pulling out his favorite floral sports jacket. His nephew clapped. 

*****

The reunion was being held in the cafeteria, the tables had been pushed aside and there were new highschoolers on the basketball drapes—or whatever they were called, Ryan didn’t know—but other than that, it was so similar that Ryan felt like he was back in high school, all that was missing was his hat and Sharpay ordering him around to do her evil bidding. 

As he walked in alongside Sharpay and Zeke, Kelsi and her girlfriend Mari promising to find him later, he couldn’t help but wish he hadn’t missed the two-year reunion. 

He scanned the room, telling himself he wasn’t looking for anybody in particular, his eyes landed on Gabriella where she stood, talking to Tylor and Martha. Ryan smiled and slipped away from his sister and brother-in-law. He snuck up behind Gabby, holding a finger to his lips when he caught Martha’s eye before slipping his arms around Gabriella’s waist. She leaned back into him, probably assuming he was Troy, who Ryan had learned through Kelsi she was now married to, and looked up at him over her shoulder. 

Her eyes widened comically and Ryan couldn’t help but laugh even as her squeal split his ear. She quickly twisted in his arms, pulling him into a surprisingly tight, proper hug. 

“Ryan Evans,” He heard Taylor say, he looked up to see her looking at him with that look on her face. The one that said she knew everything. “Where the hell have you been?” Ryan smiled and pulled away from Gabriella, giving Taylor a hug as well. 

“New York, of course, busy getting famous.” He replied in an overly posh voice. She raised an eyebrow at him, and he deflated slightly, rubbing his neck. “I was having a bit of trouble settling in, didn’t want to come back and have to start all over.” An arm slung itself over his shoulder. 

“Where have I heard that line before?” The arm’s voice asked, humming. “Maybe when my lovely wife tried it on me?” Ryan could almost _hear_ Gabriella roll her eyes. “It’s good to see you, Ry.” Troy kissed the side of his head with a very exaggerated smack. 

“Wish I could say the same, Troy,” Ryan snarked, but hugged him back nonetheless. 

“Oh! Where’s Chad?” Martha asked suddenly, “He was hoping you’d come!” She looked around frantically, as Ryan panicked on the inside. An actor at heart, however, he forced himself to stay relaxed. 

“Don’t worry about it, Martha, I’ve gotta make the rounds anyway, I’m sure I’ll find him.” He said with a forced smirk. “I’ll find you guys again later, okay?” 

“You want me to come with?” Gabby asked as he started backing away, a strangely worried look on her face. Ryan shook his head and waved her away. 

“Please,” He said with faux confidence, “I owned this place.” 

*****

Five minutes later he remembered how many people he was actually friends with, or more like how many people he wasn’t. He said hello to Jason, Bailey, and Chucky, the basketballers he knew through Zeke; then Carla, Tera, and Erin, Martha’s cheer friends back in the day; a few theater kids here and there that Ms. D had turned away for the sake of keeping Sharpay happy and their Drama department funded. Soon he found himself talking to that one blonde cheerleader whose name he had never bothered to remember because she was more or less the Sharpay of the cheer squad, i.e. she thought she was hot shit, when, in reality, there was always someone better than her. Sharpay knew that now so he could say it. He didn’t think the cheerleader did. 

“I kid you not, three seconds later he was screaming at me, ‘Nikki, open the damn door and let the bird out!’” She said with a giggle, Ryan laughed along because he was supposed to. 

“Well, Nikki,” Which was apparently her name. “I hope the rest of your college experience was better than that.” Ryan offered, trying to gracefully bow out of the conversation. She rolled her eyes. 

“Ugh, it totally was until I found out my roommate was a dyke,” She said with a smile that didn’t match her words. Ryan’s blood turned cold. “You would not believe how many times that bitch tried to come onto me.” 

“Probably none at all, considering your personality…” Ryan muttered just quiet enough for her not to hear. He zoned out for a moment, not bothering to pay attention to whatever new homophobic bullshit she was spouting, until- 

“...And all these fags wearing pink and flowers and feminine shit. Nowadays it takes a real man to wear them without being afraid of someone thinking he’s gay because of that.” _’That literally makes no sense,’_ Ryan thought, but he kept his mouth shut. “Like you…” Nikki said, reaching out and taking his lapel between her fingers. Ryan couldn’t help but snort. 

“Oh no, sweetheart,” He said batting away her hand, ignoring the insulted look on her face. “Actually, I’m-” 

_“There_ you are, babe, I’ve been looking everywhere for you.” A smooth voice interrupted, an arm wrapping around his waist and pulling him back into a hard chest. Ryan couldn’t pretend like he didn’t know who’s voice that was. He looked back and up, and up, and wow Chad had had a late growth spurt. _Damn._ His hair was shorter too, just a bit, the sides sheared close, the top left relatively long. His smile was the same though, and his eyes… 

His eyes were looking directly into Ryan’s. Chad winked. 

“Chad, what’re you-” 

“Why’re you talking to _her,_ Ry?” Chad cut him off again. “You remember what she said last time.” Ryan opened his mouth to speak, to remind him that he wasn’t there since he apparently had forgotten, but Chad kept going. “Oh, wait, you weren’t here,” He said with his classic wide smile. “Too busy blowing everybody’s mind at that fancy school of yours.” A scoff saved Ryan from falling deeper into his old schoolmate’s eyes. He turned back to Nikki. 

“Yeah right, as if a f-” 

“You better watch what you say next, Nik,” Chad’s voice had gone cold, all previous warmth it held when he was talking to Ryan gone. “We wouldn’t want a repeat of what happened last year, now would we?” Nikki huffed, looking conflicted. “Exactly, now would you leave me and my boyfriend alone?” 

Nikki huffed and turned on her heel, disappearing into the crowd. 

Ryan didn’t spare Nikki a glance as she left, instead, continuing to stare over his shoulder at Chad. But he knew when she was gone because Chad’s posture relaxed, the warmth returned to his face, his arm... stayed around Ryan’s waist. 

“Bold move, Danforth. I hope you remember how quickly rumors spread around here.” Ryan said raising an eyebrow. 

“I don’t mind if you don’t,” Chad replied with a shrug, his grip on Ryan tightening a little. Ryan eyed him skeptically, more on edge than he’d like to admit after Nikki. If Chad was messing with him, pulling some stupid highschool prank, Ryan didn’t know what he’d do. 

_‘Cry.’_ His mind supplied, reminding him of how self-conscious he was behind his confident exterior, reminding him of why he didn’t want to come home in the first place. Reminding him why he hadn’t come out in high school. 

He didn’t want to be _the_ gay kid, he didn’t want bitchy cheerleaders calling him “fag”, or cocky sports dudes pretending to like him for a dare. 

_‘Is that what this is? Is this a dare? Is that why his arm is still around my waist?’_ The irrational side of Ryan’s brain asked. The rational side pointed out that no one here would have dared Chad to do such a thing, nor would Chad follow through with such a dare since he’s a good person. 

_‘But_ is _he? You haven’t seen him in five years, since before you came out. He may hate you now, he may be working with her to embarrass you. He may be-’_

There was a hand on Ryan’s face. 

“Ry? Ryan are you okay?” Chad’s voice broke him out of his downward spiral, his fingers brushing lightly against his cheek. “Ryan, bud, take a deep breath, come on.” 

He was breathing too fast, too harsh. He was panicking. He hadn’t had a bad anxiety attack since he couldn’t get the choreo down for Wicked and opening night was three months away. He needed… He needed the stage. 

“I have to go.” Ryan gasped, twisting out of Chad’s arm and running off into the thick crowd of past East High students. 

*****


	2. The Reunion - Chad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chad's POV of the reunion before and after Ryan ran off.  
> TW: Homophobic language still

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so we're back again :) Thanks for the comments and the kudos y'all! I hope everyone enjoys, you'll see me again in a week   
> \- Cody Helene

Chad had been hoping to see Ryan again. He hadn’t seen him since he ran off to New York City, blocking Chad on Instagram, Facebook, everything. Blocking him from his life. 

Well, he had blocked everybody in all fairness, it wasn’t like Chad was special. Chad was never special to Ryan. It was that that killed him the most. 

He didn’t know why it had bothered him back in high school, back when he’d thought he’d be with Taylor forever, become the first-ever First Man, and live happily ever after. Back when he thought his feelings for Ryan were completely platonic. 

But then he grew up, then Taylor had left him to focus on her studies, then he noticed how pretty all the blond boys were, especially the talented ones. Then he saw Sharpay again and remembered Ryan, remembered how much it had hurt to be unimportant to him, and he realized. 

He was in love with Ryan Evans, and he had been for a while. 

Chad had tried to contact him when he and his team had a trip to NYC on the books to play a game there. He was going to ask him out, take him to some fancy restaurant that he never would have been able to afford back in high school, but was willing to drop a buck on in college, but when all his messages refused to deliver, Chad understood that wasn’t going to happen. There would be no seeing Ryan for him, no taking him out, no telling him he loved him, no sitting front row on all the plays he choreographed or directed or stared in. 

The only bit of Ryan Chad could get was what he could gather from Sharpay, Zeke, and Kelsi. And, of course, the many articles praising his name. 

Chad hadn’t been surprised when Ryan hadn’t shown up for the two-year reunion, not when he didn’t come home for summer or winter breaks. Ryan was gone, out of reach. He wouldn’t be coming home to Chad. 

Until Chad started hearing whispers about Ryan coming home for the five-year reunion, then all of a sudden Chad was booking plane tickets home. Chad hadn’t been planning on going home, he was still settling into his new place in the Big Apple, getting used to his new teammates. The Knicks were a welcoming group, but their practice schedule was grueling. 

It was rather funny, Chad thought, going all the way home to Albuquerque just to see a boy that lived in the same city as him. But New York wasn’t small, it wasn’t like Chad could just bump into Ryan in the streets, or while grabbing groceries, or at any bar. No matter if Chad could have sworn he has him down every alley and isle, on every barstool occupied by a small blond. So he went home. 

He went home and went to his reunion and looked for Ryan, only to find him talking to the same homophobic bitch that had cursed Chad out the year before. 

Chad heard Nikki rant at him, heard her come onto him, saw him stiffen and open his mouth. And Chad had gone through this alone, he didn’t want Ryan too. 

_“There_ you are, babe, I’ve been looking everywhere for you,” Chad said, walking up behind Ryan and wrapping an arm around his waist. He couldn’t help but pull him tight against himself, it just felt right, having Ryan in his arms. 

Ryan looked up at him and… _‘God, he’s even more gorgeous.’_ Chad thought. The blond boy’s hair was still stylishly short, his blue eyes wide with surprise, his floral suit tailored tight showing off his dancer’s body. 

Chad watched as Ryan’s eye’s roamed over his face before settling on his eyes. And, well, Chad couldn’t _not_ wink. Just as he couldn’t not smile as Ryan’s cheeks reddened softly. 

“Chad, what’re you-” Ryan apparently wasn’t catching on fast. 

“Why’re you talking to _her,_ Ry?” Chad cut him off again. He didn’t want to be rude, but he also didn’t want Ryan to ruin what he had going. “You remember what she said last time… Oh, wait, you weren’t here,” Chad smiled down at him again. “Too busy blowing everybody’s mind at that fancy school of yours.” Chad couldn’t be bothered to keep the pride from his voice. Nikki scoffed, apparently having grown tired of watching Chad’s show. 

“Yeah right, as if a f-” Nikki started. Chad felt anger start to boil within him, knowing from experience where she was going. 

“You better watch what you say next, Nik,” Chad glared at her. “We wouldn’t want a repeat of what happened last year, now would we?” Nikki looked conflicted like she couldn’t decide if she wanted to stay and torment them or stay at the event at all. In fact, Chad could already get her kicked out if he wanted to. If Ryan wanted him to. She was on probation from last year. 

“Exactly, now would you leave me and my boyfriend alone?” 

*****

Maybe he had gone too far. He must have, right? To make Ryan panic and run away like that. 

Chad had been about to go after him when Sharpay had appeared. The hand on his shoulder and a whispered ‘I’ll get him,’ told him to stay back and leave them be. A few seconds later, Troy was at his side, a confused yet pitying smile on his face, looking just about ready to offer a hug at any second. Chad shook his head and stepped off into the crowd. 

He assumed Ryan went to the theater, so Chad would not. Not that he would anyway, Chad had his own stage. 

*****

As Chad’s feet led him mindlessly to the main court, he thought about all the different places he could have gone wrong. 

_‘Did I come on too strong at the end there? Maybe Ryan isn’t interested. Maybe Ryan isn’t even gay at all and I was that dick that assumed.’_ Chad thought. 

_‘Maybe I shouldn’t have butted in and Ryan had the situation under control, he is an Evans after all, and Evans’ don’t take shit from anyone.’_

Chad neared the doors to the court. 

_‘God, Ryan would have ripped her apart._

_‘I would have liked to see that. Should have stayed out of it, let Ryan take care of himself. Sharpay told you he doesn’t let anyone walk all over him anymore. Not even her._

_‘But…’_ Chad shook his head, pushing the doors to the court open. _‘No. No one should have to go through that alone. You learned that two years ago when-’_

There was somebody on his court. 

More specifically, there was one Ryan Evans on his court. A ball in hand, dribbling it clumsily before taking a shot at a basket and, much to Chad’s surprise, getting nothing but net. Chad should go. Leave Ryan in peace to calm down, maybe send Sharpay his way. 

Chad cleared his throat. Ryan’s head snapped to find the source of the noise. 

“Excellent form,” Chad said with a crooked smile, trying his hardest to not be awkward, only succeeding in the slightest. It didn’t help that Ryan just stared at him. “I can go if you’d like…” Chad offered, backing away slowly, then turning and walking faster when Ryan didn’t say anything. 

“Wait!” Chad looked over his shoulder to see Ryan with a slightly panicked expression on his face. The blond bit his lip hesitantly. “Would you sit with me?” Chad’s chest felt a little lighter as he nodded, maybe he hadn’t upset Ryan that much after all. 

Chad walked back towards Ryan, expecting the other man to join him on the way to the bleachers, surprised when, instead, Ryan simply plopped down on the polished wood floor, looking at the ball between his palms sadly. Chad decided not to question it. 

“I figured you’d be on your stage,” Chad said, sinking down beside him with a quiet grunt. Ryan sighed. 

“That was never really my stage. Sharpay’s, yes. Troy’s and Gabriella’s, definitely.” He tapped the ball. “Never mine.” Ryan bounced the ball to Chad. Chad catching it and twisting it between his hands for a moment before looking back at Ryan. 

“You were all I ever saw up there.” He said passing it back. Ryan’s lips twitched slightly as he caught it. 

“I did some of my best acting in this room, actually. Acting that I was here for Sharpay. Acting like I thought the cheerleaders were pretty. Acting like I was paying any attention to the game at all and not just staring at the boys.” The ball bounced. 

“I wouldn’t say it was your best acting, but maybe I was just paying too much attention.” Chad cringed at his own words, he shouldn’t have said that, he knew how it felt to be told ‘oh I’ve known forever’ when you come out to someone. He didn’t pass the ball, instead deciding to share something else. “I missed seeing you at my games. Sometimes I’d look up, expecting to see you with your sister when she came to support Zeke, or Gabby when we played Berkeley. I knew you wouldn’t be there, I don’t know why it hurt every time I realized you weren’t.” Chad confessed, passing the ball again. 

“Did you look when you played the Lions?” 

“No, I-” That was a question, not a confession. Or was it both? “Wait, were you there?” Chad asked, forgetting to pass the ball, falling into his old habit of hugging it to his chest instead, like a safety blanket. 

“Tied at the end of the second half, twelve seconds on the clock, Danforth with the winning basket,” Ryan said quietly, picking at his fingers. He nodded. “I was there.” 

Chad was speechless as he stared at the other man. Ryan looked at him self-consciously. 

“I didn’t look, I didn’t think you’d be there, I…” Now it was Chad’s turn to feel self-conscious. “I didn’t think you cared.” 

Ryan just shrugged and looked away, curling his arms around his knees. Chad wished he could guess what the other man was thinking, but all he could gather from Ryan’s body language was that he was closed off again. Then, suddenly, his body relaxed and he turned back to Chad with a smile on his pretty pink lips. And Chad was glad. 

Until he realized it didn’t quite reach the young actor’s eyes. 

“Are you kidding me? Chad Danforth ran these halls!” He said with faux enthusiasm. Chad’s skin began to crawl. “Of course I cared.” And there it was. An obvious emphasis on ‘cared’, past-tense. 

Chad’s stomach dropped. He had never felt quite so exposed on the court before, especially not East High’s. He hugged the ball closer and forced himself to smile back. 

“I’d say these halls belonged to your sister and Troy, but I’ll take it anyway.” He said, the satisfaction in his voice sounding fake and overdone even in his own head. He was sure the master actor could see right through him. 

Ryan’s smile faltered for a second then stayed strong. He made a show of glancing down at his watch and pretending to be surprised. 

“Would you look at that! Ten o’clock already.” His smile shifted to something apologetic, the kind of smile you gave to an acquaintance when you didn’t want to be in the same room as them any longer and were about to make a bullshit excuse. “I’ve got a flight to catch.” Ryan moved to stand and all Chad could do was watch him. 

_‘Say something!’_

“So soon?” Chad asked once his voice caught up to his mind. Ryan dusted off his legs, though his nicely pressed pants were still spotless. 

“Wasn’t sure how long I’d want to stay after the reunion.” He straightened and gave Chad a curious look, his facade dropping for a split second. “I’m honestly surprised I’ve stayed at long as I have.” 

“Well maybe I’ll—” Chad went to stand up but Ryan cut him off. 

“It was… good to see you, Chad.” The blond man said, voice unsteady and a little insincere before turning on his heel and walking away. Walking out of Chad’s life once again leaving his world dim and shadowed like the sun setting on a moonless night. 

Chad fell backward onto the polished floor, his basketball hitting the court beside him, the rest of his unfinished sentence still on his lips. 

“Maybe I’ll see you around…”


	3. New York, New York - Ryan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan's back in New York and hasn't been out since the reunion. Kelsi drags him out clubbing where he meets a boy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello hello, my lovely people!  
> Just a few notes for this chapter - no panic attacks or homophobia or anything _but_ I can't with a clear conscience post this without a PSA because I've learned in the past that some of y'all's mamas didn't teach you right, so...
> 
> PSA!!!  
> Don't _ever_ accept a drink from a stranger that you did not see either made and/or opened. If you put your drink down and you took your eyes off of it _do not_ drink it again. Ryan got off lucky by meeting a good person in this fic, don't think life is like this. Stay safe ladies, gents, and everyone else and be smart.  
> Anyway! Enjoy my guys :)  
> \- Cody Helene

Ryan had lied and he didn’t feel good about it. 

Sure, he was an actor and a pretty damn good one if he was being honest. People—strangers, acquaintances, anyone that didn’t know him well—like to joke that he couldn’t be trusted: _“Actors are just liars with a stage,”_ they’d laugh because they thought they were funny. He’d laugh because he’d know how wrong they were. 

He was a _shit_ liar. 

Ryan slipped back into the cafeteria, fake smile still on his lips. He found Gabriella fast enough, giving her a quick hug and a goodbye, telling Kelsi and Meri he’d see them in New York. He didn’t miss the way the old table stared after him. He didn’t miss the way Gabby glared at the blonde that stood laughing in the corner. 

He didn’t need to say goodbye to Sharpay, he’d see her in the morning when he was still in Albuquerque and not in New York, where he told Chad he’d be. 

He sighed, rubbing a hand over his face as he walked through the halls. If he were Gabriella this would be his big solo moment. That thought brought a smile to his face despite the fact that he was drowning in self-pity. 

It was no secret that the girl used to sing in the halls, there were cameras after all. It would have been embarrassing if she hadn’t been so good. 

Or if Taylor had let her geeks leak the video after they found it on the school’s private, password-protected, storage banks. Even without the video, word got around though. 

Cold air hit Ryan’s face as he pushed open one of the sets of double doors. He wrapped his arms around himself as he walked toward the car his parents had lent him for his time home. He didn’t realize how exhausted he really was until he saw a black shadow streaking away from his car, he blamed it on his sleep-deprived mind and pulled out his phone, sending a quick text to Sharpay to tell her he’d left. Though he was sure she already knew. 

He reached his car to see a piece of paper folded up and placed nicely under his windshield wiper, and maybe he hadn’t imagined the shadow after all. Ryan pulled the note free, looking in the direction the figure had gone but seeing no one, and unfolded the paper. 

The note was simple, just a few words written in chicken scratch followed by a phone number. He didn’t recognize the number, but the handwriting was beyond familiar. Chad must have had to get a new number once he hit the big times. 

_Let me know when you land safely._

Ryan slipped the note into his pocket and unlocked his car. 

*****

Sharpay drove him to the airport the next morning, because, though Ryan _had_ been lying when he told Chad that he was leaving that night, he had been one hundred percent serious when he said he didn’t want to stay long. 

Sharpay watched him carefully but didn’t bring up what had happened the night before, for which Ryan was thankful. He couldn’t help the feeling that she’d be disappointed in him. Because he hadn’t stood up for himself; because he hadn’t made a move on Chad; because Chad’s note was still sitting in the pocket of his jacket, number unprogrammed into his phone. 

Hell, _Ryan_ was disappointed in him. Mostly for not ripping the blonde to shreds. It was like he came home and all the progress he had made in being comfortable with himself evaporated and he was back hiding in the closet. Back behind the mascot mask, pretending that he _wasn’t_ looking at Chad. 

_Chad._ The boy that he had loved in high school, the man that had come to save the night before. The man that more or less told Ryan that he loved him back. The boy that looked at him with pain-filled eyes as Ryan pretended that he stopped loving him in the years since they last talked. Ryan almost convinced himself to ignore it, the look on Chad’s face, but he would have had to be blind not to see it. 

He wished he hadn’t had to see it. 

He wished he hadn’t been the one to cause it. 

*****

Ryan didn’t let Chad know when he landed. 

But he’d be lying if he said he didn’t feel guilty about it. 

*****

“Ryan, you’ve been moping about since the reunion. You need to get out.” 

Kelsi was laying in his bed, legs propped up against the wall as she looked at him upside down. Ryan didn’t say anything, he couldn’t disagree because she was right but he wasn’t about to agree with her either, his pride wouldn’t allow it. 

“Come out with us tonight. We’re going to go to the Tunnel. I know you love it there.” Ryan sighed. 

“Kels, don’t take this the wrong way but I don’t really feel up to being your friends’ token gay tonight.” He didn’t have to look to know Kelsi was glaring at him. 

“You are aware I’m going to be there, right?” There was a rustling, Ryan assumed she was sitting up. “You know, with my girlfriend.” 

“It’s different and you know it.” He said, looking over his shoulder at her, before turning back to his computer. The lyrics on his screen stared back at him, the words running together. 

Kelsi sighed. “I know.” She said quietly. “They’re just not used to being around gay men.” 

“They went to Julliard, Kelsi, they’ve always been surrounded by gay men.” He let out a humorless laugh. “Hell, most of their boyfriends have flirted with me more than them.” 

“Ryan,” Her tone had turned begging, and Ryan had never been good at telling her no when she sounded like that. 

“Kelsi, I have work to do.” 

He heard her footsteps approach his desk, felt it as she leaned over his shoulder. She was quiet for a moment as she read over the progress he’d made, which, admittedly was not very much. 

“You haven’t changed this since the last time I looked over it for you.” She patted his shoulder. “And it’s still very depressing. Get up, we’re going out. I’ll help you with this in the morning.” 

Ryan knew he wasn’t going to win this fight. 

*****

The lights were too bright and the music was too loud. But Kelsi was right, Ryan loved it. He hadn’t been able to stop the smile that spread across his face as he walked through the doors. 

Now, four drinks deep and separated from Kelsi’s friends, he was having the time of his life on the dance floor. 

The man he was dancing with at that moment knew how to move and Ryan would be lying if he said it wasn’t hot. He always had a thing for boys who were good at what they did, whether that was dancing, or singing, or acting- 

_‘Or playing basketball and being an all-around good person.’_ His brain reminded him. Again. Ryan shook his head and did his best to ignore the thought of Chad, focusing on the man in front of him instead. 

He was a relatively big man; wide shoulders, narrow hips, and at least six inches on Ryan. When the lights flashed just right Ryan could see a line of freckles across his nose that he couldn’t help but love. 

Ryan smiled as the man wrapped his arms around his waist, pulling him closer, and looped his arms around the man’s neck. They danced until the song ended, the man using the rare quiet as the next song build to lean down, lips pressed close to Ryan’s ear. Ryan shivered slightly as he felt lips brush skin and almost missed what the man said. 

“Another drink?” He asked, loud enough to be heard over the other clubbers still yelling around them. Ryan smiled and nodded. 

“I’m Ryan, by the way.” If the man was going to buy him a drink he may as well know his name. The man gave him a wide, toothy smile. 

“Joseph.” He said, taking Ryan’s hand and leading him through the crowd. Ryan tugged his hand slightly when he realized they were heading away from the bar. But the man just looked back at him and chuckled. “Do you trust me, Ryan?” He called over the music. 

“Not particularly, no.” Came Ryan’s reply. Joseph just smiled and continued leading him through the crowd. He wasn’t going to yell over the noise again, it seemed. 

Ryan followed, nonetheless, he wouldn’t leave the room, but he was curious to see where his dance partner was taking him. 

He wasn’t disappointed when they came to a halt in front of an admittedly tacky velvet rope guarded by a large bouncer. 

Joseph let go of Ryan’s hand and offered it to the bouncer instead, who’s intimidating face melted into a kind smile as he clasped the offered hand and allowed himself to be pulled into a quick hug. 

“Good to see you, Jo!” Ryan heard the bouncer’s voice over the music easily. 

“You too, Ron!” Joseph said with a laugh. “Any of the boys here? We planned to meet, but you know how flakey they are.” 

The bouncer—Ron—nodded, still smiling. “A few are behind the rope, a few more out in the crowd.” He unclipped the rope and waved them through. “Have a good night, boys.” Joseph laughed again, slapping Ron on the shoulder as they passed. 

“Thank you very much!” He took Ryan’s hand again, though there wasn’t much of a crowd there. “And tell Amy I say hello!” Ron gave them a terrifying glare, but Ryan could still see the glint in his eye. 

“You and your boys stay away from my wife.” 

Joseph smiled and shook his head, now out of earshot as they ascended a staircase. 

“I wouldn’t be surprised if one or two of them made a move on his wife,” Joseph said, now speaking to Ryan, the smile still firmly on his face, and, wow this was a happy man. He had to be about twenty-six, Ryan guessed now that there was slightly better lighting, but he still laughed like a teenager. It was cute, but he didn’t know if he could handle that much of a bubbly personality for more than one night. 

Ryan raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t tell me you were royalty,” he said, deciding to change the topic. Joseph shrugged. 

“Just here in New York, people barely recognize us out of city limits.” 

“You in a boyband or something?” Ryan teased, looking Joseph up and down. “I can’t say I’m surprised, with those moves and that body.” He got a laugh for that. Joseph was easy to make laugh, he liked that. 

“I’ll introduce you to the boys then run and grab the drinks,” Joseph said when he stopped laughing. “I think they’ll like you.” 

Ryan shrugged in response, it didn’t matter much to him. It also didn’t escape his notice that Joseph failed to mention what exactly got him into the VIP section. 

There were a few shouts loud enough to hear now that the music was a little quieter and they were separated from the crowd, and someone calling to Joseph. Ryan followed in his wake as he made his way over to, what Ryan assumed to be, his ‘boys’. 

“Hello, hello, hello, boys,” Joseph said, coming to a stop in front of a group of rowdy men piled onto the couch lining the low wall that overlooked the rest of the club. Lights painted the dance floor beneath them but left the upper level mostly lit by steadily glowing lights. 

Ryan was surprised when Joseph stumbled back slightly, almost falling into him, as another man crashed into his chest. He laughed, nonetheless. 

“RJ, I saw you yesterday,” Joseph complained, definitely not seriously. He looked back at Ryan. “He’s a cuddly drunk,” he explained and Ryan couldn’t help but smile. RJ lifted his head from Joseph’s neck and looked over his shoulder, curiously. 

“Who’iz this?” He slurred, a stunningly bright smile on his face. Joseph pushed RJ off of him and pulled Ryan forward. 

“Boys, this is Ryan. Ryan, this is RJ, Mitchell, Alonzo, and Dennis, but we call him Junior.” He said, introducing the few men that were paying attention to them and ignoring the many that were not. Ryan waved at them. “What do you drink?” Joseph asked, regaining his attention. 

“Um…” He thought for a second, gauging his level of drunkness, then shrugged. “Whatever you’re having is fine.” Joseph nodded. 

“And a round of shots for being late!” Alonzo called as Joseph turned away, he shot a look over his shoulder. 

“I was here before you!” He argued, Alonzo just shrugged. 

“But you were distracted. This is supposed to be _team bonding time.”_ He said, but it was clear he was joking. Joseph just rolled his eyes and turned away again. 

“Sorry to have taken your man,” Ryan said after a moment. Mitchell smiled up at him and waved away the apology. 

“Lord knows he would be complaining by now if he hadn’t made his rounds. Though, I admit, you’ve held his attention longer than most…” Ryan raised an eyebrow at that. 

“You all come out together often?” He asked. 

“Enough.” And that was all the answer he got before RJ interrupted with another bright smile. 

“Siddown, Ry, you seem nice,” 

Ryan nearly laughed at that and did what the drunken man said, taking a seat on the long couch. Joseph’s friends were surprisingly kind and interested in his life, though he supposed they had to be kind if they were friends with, who Ryan was starting to think was, one of the nicest people he’d met. Eventually, Joseph came back with shots for everyone and two bright blue somethings. Ryan very pointedly took the drink Joseph did not hold out to him which, admittedly didn’t ensure safety but he wasn’t about to drink something a stranger gave him, even if he was a very nice stranger with very nice friends. Joseph just gave him a smile and accepted the change, falling into conversation with Ryan and his friends. 

*****

It was considerably later and Ryan was considerably drunker when the boys started shouting like they had when Joseph had first led him in. Joseph removed his arm from around Ryan’s shoulder, Ryan willingly leaning into Junior on his other side, who had grown to be Ryan’s favorite of this friend group, probably above Joseph. Definitely above whoever this new person was, though the team seemed ecstatic to see him. 

Ryan looked up, his eyes finding Joseph where he was hugging the latecomer. He couldn’t see much of the new man, just tight jeans, an even tighter shirt, and a nice pair of leather boots that Ryan immediately envied. 

“Those are nice shoes,” Ryan muttered, making Junior chuckle next to him as the boots drew closer. He ruffled Ryan’s hair lightly and Ryan was surprised with how comfortable he’d gotten to these men in just a few hours. He didn’t let anyone touch his hair. 

“Just wait ‘til you meet the man who owns them,” Junior said, quietly, before turning his attention to said owner. “Chad, man, I didn’t think you were going to pull yourself outta your cave to come tonight!” 

Ryan’s eyes snapped up from the boots, meeting a pair of very familiar eyes that were already staring directly at him. His blood went cold and he sat up straighter, suddenly feeling sober, despite the amount of alcohol in his bloodstream. 

“Mother fucker…” Ryan muttered turning his eyes to Joseph, then Junior and Mitchell. “Was anyone gonna tell me that you were the goddamn Knicks?” 

*****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, those are the names of real Knicks players (besides Joseph). Why? Idk man why not. I'm still working on the last chapter but I'll try to have it up on time next week :)


	4. New York, New York - Chad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chad's been moping about ever since the reunion, turning down invitations from his teammates for nights out until he can't anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have made it to the ends ladies, gents, and friends :) I was actually able to knock this out a little before posting time (I thought I was going to be late bc I wasn't Feeling It but looks like I worried for nothing) so I figured I'd go ahead and post it... I hope everyone enjoys!  
> One last thing, a huge thanks to my buddy hotwheels_kin for beta-ing this whole thing. Go check her out and maybe I'll be able to get her to write the Rad I've been pushing for 5ever.  
> Have good lives, stay safe! (And let me know if you have any other ideas for fics)  
> \- Cody Helene

Chad’s phone had been blowing up all night as each of his teammates texted him repetitively to go and meet them at the club. 

Chad didn’t want to, he’d much rather sit on his couch and watch League of Their Own in all honesty. But he knew he hadn’t been very present with the team since the reunion. 

The reunion… 

He had stayed a few extra days in Albuquerque; Zeke asked if he could swing by and meet the new team, claiming that the kids didn’t believe that a professional was still on speaking terms with their lowly coach, a trick that Chad did _not_ fall for, thank you very much. But he wanted to meet the team anyway, maybe give them a few pointers, though he was sure Zeke had it under control and he had only heard good things. 

He ended up going in four days in a row, not having it in him quite yet to leave his old home behind again and go back to New York. Back to Ryan’s city. 

He never got a text or a call from the other man, though he couldn’t say he had been expecting to. Zeke told him Ryan had made it back safely, totally unprompted by Chad, of course. But he had to return to the city eventually, and now, it seemed, he would have to get up, get dressed, and return to the club as well. 

*****

It was past midnight by the time he finally made it to the Tunnel, and he was dreading it even more by that point. Chad knew that most of the team would be drunk already, he really had his work cut out for him if he ever wanted to catch up. 

He entered the club quickly, not bothering with the line since Drew was at the door. His head was already hurting by the time the flashing lights overtook his vision, but he worked his way deeper into the crowd, it would be quieter up top. Though the boys would most definitely be loud. 

At one point as he neared the stairs, Chad’s eyes caught on a short girl with brown hair, a taller girl standing next to her, both were looking around frantically with extremely worried looks on their faces. Chad could have _sworn_ it was Kelsi, until the girl’s eyes passed over him without so much as a pause and he remembered how many short, brown-haired girls there were in New York City on any given night. He reached the stairs with no further distractions. 

Ron smiled at him as Chad approached, the big, normally intimidating, man looking more like a friendly uncle. He held out a hand and Chad clasped it, letting the man pull him in for a hug. 

“Haven’t seen you in a while, Chad, the boys said you were out of town?” Ron asked, the thought of him caring so much, or at all, making Chad smile lightly despite how little he wanted to be there at that moment. He nodded. 

“Went back home for a high school reunion, spent a few extra days giving the new team some pointers,” Chad spoke as softly as he could without being drowned out by the music, he didn’t really feel like shouting tonight. Ron shook his head with a chuckle. 

“Of course you did. How long have you been back?” 

“Two weeks. Been a little busy to go clubbing, but maybe next time I’ll swing by to say hello.” Chad said with another smile. Ron always brought out a happy side in the whole team. “How’s Amy? And the girls?” Ron sighed and ran a hand through his hair. 

“Amy is good, the girls are growing older by the day, soon enough they’ll be talking about boys and college.” He shivered and Chad couldn’t help but laugh. 

“They just turned two and three, Ron.” Ron shrugged and reached for the rope. 

“Well, that’s the way it seems anyway.” 

Chad nodded. “I’m sure.” He gave Ron another handshake before finally walking past him. “Let them know I say hi.” 

“Will do. Have a good night, Chad.” 

“You too.” And with that, he made his way up the stairs to where his team waited. 

*****

Chad slowly made his way through the lounge, stopping to say hello to teammates and familiar faces that were scattered around or on their way out. Eventually, he reached the couch where he knew most of his team would be sitting, and, admittedly, the men he preferred to spend time with. 

Joseph got up as soon as he saw him, separating from a pretty blond boy whose face was now obscured by Junior’s shoulder. Joseph gave him a tight hug. He was probably the player Chad was closest to on the team, which had a bit to do with their shared love for men, but a hell of a lot more to do with Joseph’s permanently happy personality. He reminded Chad a bit of Jason, though, as much as he loved Jason, Joseph was about ten times smarter. 

“How’re you doing, man?” Joseph asked quietly. Chad just shrugged, and that was enough for Joseph. The man nodded and let go of him, letting Chad take a step back. Joseph gave him an excited smile. “You will not believe the boy I met.” 

Chad let himself be led to the couch, rolling his eyes at his friend. “Real happy for you man,” Joseph shook his head and snickered at a joke that Chad didn’t quite get. 

“Nah, man, I realized an hour or so back that this one’s not for me,” He said quietly as they neared the couch. The blond boy’s features grew clearer in the poor rather dim lighting, but Chad didn’t need to see them clearly to know exactly what they looked like, because, how the _hell_ did Joseph find Ryan in one night while Chad had been looking for _months?_

Chad waited patiently as Ryan’s eyes made their way up his body, from his boots until they met Chad’s own. 

Ryan sat silently for a moment before looking away to Chad’s teammates. Then— 

“Was anyone gonna tell me that you were the goddamn Knicks?” 

Chad shoved his hands in his too-tight pockets and rocked back on his heels as the team’s laughter sounded around them. Ryan did not look happy at all when Junior shrugged and shook his head. 

“Kelsi’s worried about you, Ry,” Chad said, happy when Ryan’s eyes were back on him. He shouldn’t have been, Ryan had broken his heart less than a month ago, but Chad couldn’t help it, he preened under the attention. And a small part of him still wanted to forgive Ryan, to be told that Ryan didn’t mean it. 

A panicked look crossed Ryan’s face as he fished his phone from his pants pocket, looking at the screen with a curse. He unlocked his phone and tried to type out a message with clumsy fingers, cursing again when the phone slipped from his hands. He pulled back from Junior unsteadily, his whole body wobbly and obviously wasted. Chad turned to shoot Joseph a look. 

“How much did you give him?” He asked. Joseph just shrugged, happy smile firmly in place. 

“I donno, he was already pretty drunk when we came up here—don’t look at me like that, I was too,” He said when Chad’s look shifted into a glare. Chad squatted down to grab Ryan’s phone, the screen filled with countless texts from Kelsi. “God damn, I’m not going to take advantage of your friend, who do you think I am?” Joseph continued to grumble but Chad paid him no attention, typing out a message instead. 

_Ryan 1:13 am — Kelsi, this is Chad. I have Ryan. He’s pretty wasted so I'm going to take him home. Address? The response came quickly, Chad was sure she had been checking her phone every second._

_Kels 1:13 am — Thank god. If you bring him here I can take him. I’m by the bar with Meri_

_Ryan 1:14 am — It’s fine, I was just heading out anyway. You have fun with Meri._

Chad looked back up at Ryan, still perched in front of him on the couch, Chad now at eye level with him. He looked like the drinks were hitting him hard. 

“You ready to go home, bud?” 

Ryan looked at him petulantly. “‘M fine. Not even that drunk, I can get myself home.” He said, trying to stand only to fall back onto the couch since Chad was still blocking his way. 

“I’m sure,” Chad said, he couldn’t help but smile at the other man’s unusual lack of grace. “But it’s late and this is New York City, there’s no way I’m letting you walk these streets alone.” 

“But I don’t wanna go. ‘M having fun.” Ryan muttered, quiet enough that the only reason Chad heard him was because he was still kneeling in front of the drunken man. Junior, who was once again acting as Ryan’s bodily support, also heard. The statement made him chuckle. He crushed Ryan close in a hug, ruffling his hair lightly. 

“Don’t worry, Ry, I have a feeling we’ll be seeing you soon.” He said. Ryan still didn’t look happy. “You promised us tickets to your next show, after all,” Ryan lit up at that, a smile spreading across his face. The room brightened with him. Ryan nodded eagerly. 

“You, RJ, Mitchell, Joseph, and whoever else that would like it. Front and Center.” He spread his hands as if he was setting the stage. Chad couldn’t help but smile up at him. 

“I wouldn’t mind being added to that list.” Chad said. Ryan looked back down at him skeptically, but his smile didn’t dim. He nodded again. “It’s settled, then. You’ll see them soon so you don’t have to worry about cutting tonight short.” Chad tried to reason, but Ryan just looked at him, a petulant pout on his face. “Right?” 

Their eyes locked in a stare down for a few moments before Ryan slouched, leaning heavily into RJ. 

_“Fine.”_ He said, finally, sitting up and reaching his arms out as if he were waiting for Chad to pick him up. “Take me home, Chad.” 

Chad stood, ignoring the way his stomach flipped at his drunk friend’s words, and grabbed Ryan’s arms, pulling him up, close enough so the blond could lean on him for support. Ryan wrapped an arm around his waist. Chad tried to pretend he hadn’t. 

“Thanks for taking care of him, guys,” Chad said with a smile towards his teammates. Joseph smiled, RJ just shrugged and nodded. 

“Let us know when you get him home safe.” RJ said, looking surprisingly worried about the boy he’d met less than three hours before. Chad nodded. 

“Will do. Have a good night guys, promise I’ll actually come to the next team night out.” 

As they passed Joseph, Ryan shugged out of Chad’s hold, stumbling to the other, mostly sober, man, pressing an exaggeratedly loud kiss to his cheek. 

“You,” he said, reaching out to tap Joseph on the nose, “call me when you’re not so drunk and maybe we can finish what was supposed to happen tonight.” Jealousy and anger rose in Chad’s throat at Ryan’s proposition, but Joseph, still smiling, just grabbed Ryan’s finger, moving it away from his face. 

“A tempting offer, Ryan, but I don’t think that’s how this is going to go down.” He said, gently pushing Ryan back into Chad’s arms. “I’ll see you soon though, alright kid?” 

Ryan nodded, leaning back into Chad’s side, a frown on his face. 

“Alright…” 

And with that, Ryan finally let Chad lead him out into the cold of the night. 

*****

Night was never really _night_ in New York City. Not like it was back home, at least. Night in the city was loud and bright, without a single star breaking through the hodgepodge or neon lights, street lights, and billboard lights. And, as much as he missed the quiet of the suburbs back home, Chad loved it. 

They stumbled through the streets, Ryan more so than Chad, making their way in the direction Ryan’s apartment was in, according to Kelsi and Google Maps. It was a short walk, so Chad opted not to take a taxi or call a Lyft, but he soon started to regret that decision as a heavy silence settled around the two men, despite the sound of the city around them. At least if he were in a cab he could make conversation with the driver, but Chad had no clue what to say to the drunk blond who was depending on him to get him home safely. 

Eventually, as they broke through the partiers and night tourists to a slightly less crowded side street, Ryan spoke up. Or, he mumbled something, just too quiet for Chad to make out. 

“What was that, Ry?” Chad asked, trying to grab onto any chance at a conversation he might have. Ryan was quiet for a minute or so before speaking again. 

“Maybe I should just go back to dating Julliard assholes that think they’re better than everyone else.” Ryan said, his words now loud enough for Chad to hear clearly. “At least they can pretend to want me for more than one night.” And suddenly Chad wished he still couldn’t hear the boy hanging off his side. 

“Ryan, no. You deserve better than that.” Chad tried to assure him, his stomach heavy with the idea that Ryan felt so unwanted. So unloved. “You deserve someone good.” 

“Then why do none of the good guys want me?” Ryan’s voice was thick with emotion. 

“Do you mean Joseph?” Chad asked quietly, hoping that Ryan hadn’t been that taken by his friend in the short time they’d known each other. Ryan didn’t answer and Chad knew that all his hoping did nothing. He sighed. The buildings shifted from storefronts, clubs, and bars to residential buildings. “Joseph turned you down because he’s my friend.” Ryan was silent for a few minutes and Chad figured he was done talking, until Ryan’s body shook with a sob. 

“You hate me so much that even your _friends_ can’t spend time with me?” Ryan said, his voice broken. 

Chad froze. Ryan stumbled. Chad wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him closer to keep him from falling on his face. Overhead, a streetlight gleamed. 

“What on _earth_ made you think that I hate you, Ryan?” Chad asked, astonished as he looked down at his old friend. Ryan refused to look up, he lifted a hand to rub roughly at tears as they tracked down his face and sniffled. “Ryan, I need you to tell me what I did so I can fix it.” Chad said, his voice serious. Ryan shook his head. 

“I’m sorry,” He sniffled, “I know you don’t hate me, it’s just the comedown and I-” He looked up at Chad, face wet with tears, eyes shining with even more- “I don’t know what I did wrong, it was going so well.” 

Chad lifted a hand to frame the side of Ryan’s face, gentally thumbing away a tear. 

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Ry, I told you, Joseph is my friend.” 

“So he refuses to date me? Because he’s your friend-” 

“Because I love you, Ryan.” 

Ryan stared up at him, stunned. He sniffed and rubbed at his nose, then looked down at his feet. 

“That’s not funny, Chad.” He said after a moment, his voice quiet as if he were afraid to speak too loud. “I…” He tried to pull away a bit, but Chad’s arm stayed strong around Ryan’s waist. “I know I’m really pitiful right now but you don't have to make me feel better… Not like this.” 

Chad was almost speechless. _Almost_ because last time he didn’t say something Ryan Evans walked right out of his life for the second time. _Almost_ because Chad wasn’t going to let him go a third time. He slipped his hand beneath Ryan’s chin, lifting his face once again. 

“What do you think I meant when I told you I’d been missing you at the reunion? Looking for you in every stadium, down every street. Ryan, you were all I saw for our entire senior year.” Chad said, voice quiet to match Ryan’s. Their position didn’t demand much louder, they were pressed together from knee to waist, Ryan’s hands resting on Chad’s chest between them, one of Chad’s arms wrapped around Ryan’s waist, the other still cupping his chin. 

Ryan’s eyes were as wide as saucers at Chad’s words, his mouth slightly ajar. 

“I…” He shook his head slightly, but not enough to move Chad’s hand. “Why didn’t you say something?” Chad smiled slightly, maybe a little bitterly. 

“At the reunion? Or during highschool?” 

“Either,” Ryan said automatically, barely letting Chad finish his question, “both.” Chad nodded, thinking back to highschool, his eyes slipping off of Ryan and onto the dead street as he recalled. 

“Well at the runion you left so that can’t be blamed on me…” Chad started, winking at Ryan and hoping that he caught the joke. The blond did, scoffing and slapping him on the arm for it. “In highschool… I guess… I dunno, Ry,” Chad shrugged, losing his joking demeanor, “you had Kelsi, I had Taylor, we were both heading off to college soon. I guess it seemed like too big a risk and I didn’t want to mess things up. Besides, I didn’t even know if you were into men or whatever and I-” 

Ryan reached up, cutting off Chad’s ramblings by placing a hand on his cheek. Chad’s eyes snapped back to the man in his arms. 

“Chad Danforth,” he said, “I think you may just be the only person out there that didn’t assume that the theater kid was gay, and I kinda love you for it,” Ryan smiled up at him, all tears gone from his eyes. “Add it to the list of reasons why I love you.” 

“You love-” Chad started, but Ryan cut him off. 

“Of course I love you, how could I not?” He asked, but it was a rhetorical question, one that he didn’t give Chad time to answer. In fact, before Chad could even think to start listing the reasons why Ryan deserved better than him, Ryan pushed up on his toes, wrapping his arms around Chad’s neck and pressed a gentle kiss to Chad’s lips. 

Chad, though surprised, was not going to pass up on a chance to kiss Ryan Evans like he _meant_ it, like he’d always wanted too. He chased his lips as Ryan sunk back on his heels, holding him tighter to his chest. Ryan tasted like whisky and sugar, his lips soft against Chad’s. One of his hands dropped from Chad’s shoulder, grasping his wrist instead where it still cupped his face. 

Chad knew they’d have to talk about this when Ryan was completely sober, when they both were more emotionally stable. But there, in the soft, warm circle of lamplight, with his highschool love in his arms — Chad decided that was an issue for the morning. 

*****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyway,  
> Thanks for reading, all! I hope to see y'all again.  
> \- Cody Helene


End file.
